Love Letter to Мама

My beloved mother. Please forgive me for not telling you how much I love you. It’s been six years since you left me, and I thought I had let go, but today I am hysterical, remembering your smile, your gentle voice, and all your words. Today I signed up for the class I’ve been dreaming about. I quit ballet when the war started. I didn’t want to go even when you were with me. Grandma takes care of us, we have a very good relationship. After your death, Dima started drinking a lot. They also sold the house where you grew up and moved into a dormitory. Grandma Tanya is sick. Sometimes I feel like I won’t live to see 30 either. I don’t want to believe it! There’s a war going on in the country right now, and it’s hard for everyone. They’ve already taken Mariupol, where the three of us wanted to go with Dad. Dad gave our cat Jason to some village in our city because he had to serve in the army, and you were in the hospital. Natasha, Uncle Sergei’s wife, is always poking us with Danil. School is coming soon. Soon there will be screaming and hysterics. I’m tired.

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